Black Hole

Hello. Once again I shall review a movie. Today’s movie is Black Hole. In my opinion Black Hole is the corniest, cheesiest movie I remember watching! The spaceships, the robots, the battle scenes, the acting- almost every thing in this movie screams cheesy! This movie has many bad unintentionally laugh-out-loud scenes, why not make a list?

1. At the beginning there was a weird thing going on where the words Black Hole were on the screen while some classical musIc was playing in the background. It just went on and on and on. After a few minutes I just fast forwarded to the MOVIE part of the movie.

2. Once I finally got to the movie everything was already cheesy, especially the part where someone (whose name I forget) communicates with the robot via E.S.P and relays back to the rest of the crew the robot’s words, “There are old pilots, and there are bold pilots, but never are there old bold pilots.”

3. Most of the robots on the Bad guy’s ship looked like someone in a REALLY bad version of Darth Vader’s suit that was painted pink. My exact words as I watched the movie were, “Hey look, an army of Darth Vader’s girlfriends.”

4. After the evil robot was killed in battle, if battle is the name for one guy backing up and one guy moving forward while little balls of light wiz past, he just floated up and off the screen . When the crew of the-not-bad-guy-ship was battling the robots to try and save that Woman-who’s-name-I-forget from being turned into a robot I was thinking, “Why can’t she just stop whining and bust her way out of that tinfoil?” Yes, ladies and gentlemen, she was wrapped in tinfoil on a conveyor belt moving towards a beam of light. There is a whole lot more but I’m way over my computer time as it is. Just DON’T WATCH THAT MOVIE.

Titan A.E. (2000)

Aliana: This animated space, Sci Fi, comedy is really really cool! Uhhhh............. Darn it!!! I'm getting bloggers block!! :O Okay..... Arrrrrggg!! I'm just going to type random things until I think of something. blaaaa blaaa blaaa Ga'Hooole blee bloo blah blah!!! 42, the answer to life, the universe and everything!!!! :D I like cheese!!! and no I am not crazy! My mom says to leave it at that( if your disappointed, read the blog description). :)

Rory: I got this from Netflix, because it looked like something Aliana would enjoy. Yep, she did! It's made to be appropriate for kids but also tolerable for the adults taking the kids to see it. (I guess this was in the theaters at some point? I don't remember.) It has a lot of famous names doing the voices: Matt Damon, Bill Pullman, Drew Barrymore, John Leguizamo, Ron Perlman, Nathan Lane, and Jeneane Garafalo. Basically the Drej (bad guys made of pure energy) destroy the earth, and a handful of humans (including a small boy) on ships, and one giant ship called the Titan, get away. Skip forward 15 years, the boy, Cale, has grown up- now he's looking for his father- who happened to be the pilot of the Titan. Before he left, Cale's father gave him a ring which makes a map to the Titan show up his hand. Most of the movie is about the quest to find the Titan, which the bad guys are also after too, so they can destroy the human race once and for all. The coolest parts of the movie are seeing the inside of the Titan, which is basically a giant modern ark, and when the Titan is activated- reminiscent of Star Trek's Genesis project.

Galaxy Quest (1999)

Aliana: Hello! Once again I will review a movie.Okay......Galaxy Quest! I loved it loved it loved it!!! This is a laugh out loud Sci fi adventure movie ( and unlike the two other movies I have blogged about this one was made funny on purpose)! Galaxy Quest is very well written and very witty! It has a nice plot, ("Dragonflies have tiny necks" said mom just now) the space scenes look awesome, there is no cheesy humor (that I noticed) and I have nothing negative to say about it. I think this is a great family movie. Sorry if my review is to short butt (hee hee) check the time it was posted to see why.

Rory: I loved this movie when it first came out. I think at some point I actually owned a copy, but it probably went away 2 years ago in the great purge. Looking through Netflix I came across it and new instantly that Aliana was going to LOVE THIS. According to her post, I predicted correctly! Comedy + space adventure= Aliana loves it.

The characters are excellent. Particularly Alan Rickman as a serious "Ac-tor" feeling this whole tv show thing is beneath him and is painfully tortured by the act of having to repeat the same famous line over and over at conventions for crazed fans.

I'm sure most everyone is familiar with, or has seen this by now, but if you haven't it's basically a spoof on Star Trek, sort of, and the actors' existence after their television show, Galaxy Quest, ends. At a convention, the Captain, Jason Nesbith played by Tim Allen, is approached by some aliens, which he mistakes for costumed fans, and the comedy adventure ensues.

See it if you haven't before, it's funny! And if you haven't seen it in a while, it's good for a laugh again.

Reign of Fire (2002)

Aliana: Hi! it's me again! Today I will review Reign of Fire. This movie is about England in the year 2020.... Dragons now rule the earth,and few humans remain. I'm not going to give away the whole plot,my job as a blogger is to write (in this case type) my opinion . Well, it was really good until the ending when our three heroes are fighting in the ruins of London to slay the only male dragon (thus dooming the dragons to extinction) it gets a little corny(for example the lady for some unseen reason got her foot hurt,trust me, it looks cheesy on screen), my mom actually laughed out loud at one point! And I should point out that the movie sort of zipped by without letting you learn the characters names, my mom and I can only recall the name of the main character (Quinn). One positive thing to say is that the dragons looked positively hideous!!! :O

Rory: Aliana has basically said all you need to hear about the plot. It's a strange movie in the way that it's supposed to be a post-apocalyptic action adventure movie, but having dragons as the enemy makes it feel a little fantasy. It is also a strange movie because seeing Matthew McConaughey as a half-crazed, shaved- head military bad ass is just plain unexpected, and perhaps that alone makes his character creepier. Going from this to Ben Stiller's agent in Tropic Thunder could not be more of a jump. Wow, this is the same guy? I guess this makes him a good actor? Well, this is the only different character I've ever seen him play, he's the same guy in all the other movies. By the end he gets likeable and pretty much is the stand out of the whole movie for me, despite his character's death being incredibly comedic. Aliana pointed out to me that the female leads always hurt their foot and need help getting away from the bad guys. So true. They fall down a lot too. Do you hear this directors? Predictable!!!!! BORING! Think of something new next time. Sharon Stone in Solomon;s Mines just popped into my head as the most annoying female lead who can't run or get away without falling, lots of screaming, and probably lots of limping too. I'm never going to be able to take a movie seriously who use this, unless they do it a lot more cleverly, or it's somehow adding immense depth to the character. Aliana was right also about the character development, I don't remember any names in this movie either besides Quinn. In conclusion, I'm not saying it's awful. I enjoyed watching it.

The Matrix (1999)

Aliana: Ummm.... I'm not that good at writing (or typing) and this is my first blog(this was mom's idea) soooooo.... anyway... The Matrix, well it was (how do I put this?)........ AWESOME!!!!!! :D The Matrix is a super cool Sci fi movie!!! It's Action packed!, it has Kung fu A.I. (Artificial Intelligence) and everything a good Action Sci fi movie needs! There are some creepy parts. It was rated R when it come out, but I think today it would be PG13. Long story short, this is not a family movie, unless your family consists of parents and a teenager(s). Thank you for reading my first blog! :)

Rory: To be honest, the first time I saw this movie, I barely understood it. I guess I've come along way in the last 10 years to now have a basic understanding of computers, cyberspace, etc. The best part of The Matrix for me is definitely The Oracle. I wish she were my grama. I want to hang out in her kitchen, eat cookies, and have her tell me the stuff I'm going to need to hear to get through life.

I think The Matrix could also be classified as horror and comedy. After Neo (Keanu Reeves) takes the red pill and wakes up in his pod, it's one of the scariest moments. In addition, the baby being intravenously fed the liquefied remains of the dead is totally horrifying. But near the end, The Matrix truly becomes a comedy in my eyes. Let me list my three favorite laugh out loud moments:

1. Neo is fighting the bad guy in the subway. He gets knocked down, he's hurt bad, but he gets up, gains his composure and strikes a kung fu pose HARD. So hard in fact that a bunch of dust flies off his shirt.

2. Neo has just "conquered" the Matrix and now sees the world as it is: a bunch of numbers. He flies into the bad guy's body, explodes out, and does a cheesy body builder "flex" pose. His power is so tremendous, the walls bend!

3. Neo makes a confusing speech on a telephone for the last scene of the movie. The camera pans out for an aerial view of the city, and we see a tiny speck coming towards us...OMG...is it Superman? No! It's Neo, and he's FLYING!