Happily N'Ever After

As the title may suggest, this is a movie where the "Happily Ever After" stories get turned upside down!I don't think this is "Cheesy", but this movie was most likely intended for a younger audience.

My little sister was the one who wanted this move, I just stuck around so I could have new blogging material. This movie had it's laugh out loud moments, especially when Robin saw the "Handsome Prince" and asked "Is that a man?" I'm not kidding! After assuring her that he is a guy she replied "Wow, I guess the Prince is a drag queen!" By the way, he wasn't dressed in girl clothes. It was just the hair. Another LOL moment came when Cinderella's stepsisters are arguing over who gets to use the perfume first,(each sister saying that she smells bad and thus needs perfume) then Robin came in the room right when one of the sisters shouted "I smell like a dead pig!" Though I had some laughs, I could never forget to poke some fun at a movie! The trolls looked like Smurfs on steroids wearing little rabbit ears! And of course there was (this being a fairy-tale movie and fairy-tale movies are automatically required to have romance) a cheesy romantic song in which the same line over and over again.....ugh! In case you are wondering, the line was "Do I get what I want, do I want what I get?" This line referring to the Cinderella's choice between the "Handsome" Prince who does the Prince thing (literally) by the book, and the dish washing boy who actually likes her. Blech! Big, big Ewwww! I really really hate romance mushy stuff, who doesn't?

Black Hole

Hello. Once again I shall review a movie. Today’s movie is Black Hole. In my opinion Black Hole is the corniest, cheesiest movie I remember watching! The spaceships, the robots, the battle scenes, the acting- almost every thing in this movie screams cheesy! This movie has many bad unintentionally laugh-out-loud scenes, why not make a list?

1. At the beginning there was a weird thing going on where the words Black Hole were on the screen while some classical musIc was playing in the background. It just went on and on and on. After a few minutes I just fast forwarded to the MOVIE part of the movie.

2. Once I finally got to the movie everything was already cheesy, especially the part where someone (whose name I forget) communicates with the robot via E.S.P and relays back to the rest of the crew the robot’s words, “There are old pilots, and there are bold pilots, but never are there old bold pilots.”

3. Most of the robots on the Bad guy’s ship looked like someone in a REALLY bad version of Darth Vader’s suit that was painted pink. My exact words as I watched the movie were, “Hey look, an army of Darth Vader’s girlfriends.”

4. After the evil robot was killed in battle, if battle is the name for one guy backing up and one guy moving forward while little balls of light wiz past, he just floated up and off the screen . When the crew of the-not-bad-guy-ship was battling the robots to try and save that Woman-who’s-name-I-forget from being turned into a robot I was thinking, “Why can’t she just stop whining and bust her way out of that tinfoil?” Yes, ladies and gentlemen, she was wrapped in tinfoil on a conveyor belt moving towards a beam of light. There is a whole lot more but I’m way over my computer time as it is. Just DON’T WATCH THAT MOVIE.

Never Cry Wolf (1983)

Aliana: Hi! My mom says that I have to review "Never Cry Wolf" or else she won't publish anything.Never cry wolf is an excellent, Amazing, Wonderful movie ( even though it's based on a book, but since the book is an Autobiography it's not that bad).My favorite part is when food supplies are running low ,Farly notices that the wolves are eating mice,(not Caribou like he originally thought) so he decides to try it, later it shows him in his tent with some cooked mice,(they actually look like mice!) just as he is about to take his first bite..... he sees a mouse staring at him!!! He then looks around, there are mice everywhere!!! He starts munching down the cooked mice, then all the living mice run away in terror!!! (By the way, I no longer have writers block. It was just that one other movie before that I had trouble with.) :) Hey mom!!! if you are reading this it means you have a lot of blogging to catch up on!!! :)

Rory: Thanks a lot Aliana, you stole what I was going to write about! The man-eating-mice-while-mice-look-on-in-terror scene is really the best of the movie. Second best has got to be when Farly runs "au natural" with the wolves during the running of the caribou. Well, he's not entirely naked, he is still sensibly wearing his socks and boots!

This is the kind of movie, if you have a knack or calling inside you to live by your wits alone, that will make you want to say goodbye to society and go live in the wild. It does that for me. When Farly moves in next door to the wolf, they establish their boundaries (also entertaining), and become neighbors, it warms my heart. Soon after, the wolf's mate and pups show up and it's one big happy family. Later in the movie, while Farly is out running with the caribou, and his beloved wolf family goes missing- most likely victim to an enterprising wolf hunter- it's easy to start feeling great animosity toward man's exploitation/domination of "beasts" and perhaps even a hint of misanthropy.

This movie reminds me that if "success" means an world devoid of wild, I don't want to be successful.

Hey Aliana- I finished!!!